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Wednesday 8 August 2012

50 Shades of Paradise...Pound Paradise...

Well yerv read me diary...now its time to read me novel...me ferst novel...i heard all the hipe about that 50 Shades of Gray...then thort my life at Pound Paradise could be made into a novel...it was ded Kathartik to rite...I'll keep postin the chapters as thay come...so make sure you return for more...


Chapter 1 - Vag Fresh

It was an early shift…I hated earlies…my eyes were always stuck together with sticky stuff from the nite before…crusty almost…I made my way to the staff room…undid me blowse to put me overall on…that’s wen I smelt that familiar sent…Haribo….my nipples firmed and I could feel my melting prawn ring drip down my tites…I leaned over an stuck my ring in the freezer for later….I reached to spray myself with my perfume…just then I felt a firm grip on my Far La….’I’ll do that’ came the husky voice via Harolds electro voice box…I held the vibrator firm on his adams apple an asked him to say it agen…Vag fresh he said….yes I said…fabreezed it just for you….he said…no…do you want the usual 10 boxes of the Vag fresh sweets….I giggled like a little gerl…this got him aroused…

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 Chapter 2 - The lost voice…

Silence…apart from the sound of Harold rummaging to find some triple A batteries for his electro voice box handset…I had drained his power demanding he talk dirty to me…’I can’t last much longer you fat slag’ he said as his voiced faded out…My face was damp with the grease of his cola bottles…he enjoyed force feeding me haribo during intimayte moments…the store room was a mess…he had thrown me round like an empty track suit but I loved it…just then with his power restored he thrust the vibrator to his adams apple and said… ‘round 2 Macca beg bitch’…with that I dropped to my knees and took his flavoured Starburst in my mouth…I blacked out momentarily havin choked a little on the intensity of flavours…I came too with my face pressed against a box of out of date Vaj Butter…Harold had vanished…I let out a gentle post koytel fart…but the noise was familiar…not my normal wispy puffs but an electro sounding noise…Harold may have gone, but he’d left a part of him inside me…to be continued.

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 Chapter 3 - Something inside so wrong…

I sat on my till with my mind wandering…all of a sudden I heard the song…Labia Siffree - ‘Something inside so strong’ and it all came flooding back…’Something inside so Wrong’…It was 2 days now since my intimasee wiv Haribo Harold in the stock room…I had heard nothing from him…apart from a few Careless Whispers from my down belows via his electro voice handset wen passin wind…I had a few calls from his number but he didn’t say anything…silence…we were due a big order and I couldn’t help but wonder if we would pick up were we left off…I had volunteered to receive Harolds load…just then I heard the familiar sound of his airbrakes…My Vajina gripped like a vice…just as it did I heard that familiar voice from my groin ‘Please replace the batteries’ it was an omen…I slipped quietly from my till an picked up a packet of Haribo family assortment or as Harold calls them his Viagra…My heart pounded as I entered the stock room…I had a flash back to our last leeayson dangerus…just then I was brort back by a hard kick on my back door…’Coming’ I said…a frordiant slip…I raised my flaps in the receiving bay and there he was…erect in his stance…a sheet of paper in his hand and a white strip of plaster across his nose…it read - ‘I’m your handy delivery man…Bend and deliver’…my very own prince charming…he new I loved Adam Ant…I was moist…I slowly rolled down my leggings and peeled off me tites…I lay there quiet as Harold clicked the lock on the stock room door…within minits he dumped his load into my delivery hatch….to be continued.

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Chapter 4 - Take my breath away…

The intensity of his delivery in my hatch was taking my breath away…’do you want me to stop’ came the electro voice…’no’ I whispered…it had been several minits since Harold had removed his electro voice box handset from my welcoming lady garden…he was gentle…only pausing to knock 3 times on the ceiling, meaning did I want him to stop…twice on the pipes meant my answer was no…I heard the rustle of plastic…the opening of another packet of Haribo…or so I thought…this was going to be a long but intense delivery…just as I was getting my breath back antisipaytin Haribo cola bottle or his starburst Harold forced his Percy Pig into my mouth…it took me by surprise, it tasted different…it wasn’t haribo but I savoured the taste…’do you want more fat arse’ (I loved him talkin derty to me) he demanded…I couldn’t reply…I was still gaggin on his Percy Pig…’Toys’ he said…’aisle 6’ I gagged…’no, shall we try toys’ he replied…I was intreeged…how seemed like such an odd time to think about Ninja turtles or Barbie and Ken…Harold staggered across the stock room…it was glowing red…a red room…this was from the red delivery warning light…all of a sudden a pang of guilt came over me…what about Harolds wife…she was ill…Tumours on her bunions had left her unable to move…unable to pleasure Harold…I was brort back to earth with a bang as Harold tore at my primarni leopard print blowse…he had opened a box of our Pippa Pegs toys…’stick one between yer breasts’ he ordered…my nipples firmed at his demands…I obliged…he wore my legs like a winter scarf…just as Harold was about to deliver his ultimate load my flaps flung open…daylight filled the room and lit Pippa Peg between my ample breasts…we had been discovered…I spat out Harolds Percy Pig…’YOU’ I shouted…to be continued.

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Chapter 5 - Creamed off Climax...

It took a while for it to register...I was still aglow from the intensity of my mammouth seshon...I could still taste Harolds Percy Pig in my mouth...I hadn't expected another delivery so soon after...Could I really face a mouthful of Bobby Goldtop (the milkman)s cream so soon after Harolds Percy Pig and starburst...Instead of being annoyed I could see from Bobby's apron he was gently aroused by the scene that had greeted him from under my delivery flaps...'Shall I carry on as normal' said Bobby...I looked at Harold who was busy eating another packet of Haribo cola cubes ready for our next sesh...'won't put me off' came the sound of Harolds electro voicebox...'Why not' I said to Bobby'...my flaps locked tite at the thought of being watched...with that Bobby Goldtop turned to face us and pulled out his Blackberry...'do you want me to shoot it' he said as he fumbled with his autoflash...I was moist...it was becoming too much for me...I was getting concerned my Vaj Butter would begin to leak...plus I had been off the shop floor for so long...would anyone notice?...with that I felt a slap across my erect nipple...it was a Haribo lickrish lace...strawberry...Harold picked up his electro voice handset held it to his adams apple and demanded...'beg you fat bit......'Harolds battery had gone...another intense intimayte moment had drained him...i panicked...I remembered selling the last of the triple A batteries..how could I be stimulayted without the sound of Harold's vibrating electro voice talking dirty to me...I hadn't realised while all this was going on Bobby Goldtop had finished shooting and delivered his cream...'I'm only 4 mega pixels' he said...'I'll email them to you....' as quickly as he had come he was gone...I heard the whirr of his beloved milkfloat Freda as he pulled away...i felt deflayted...I had not reached my climax on this okayshon...just then like Arnold Shwartznayger with a removed voice box came Harold's dulsit tones...'I'll be back' as he slowly exited my delivery shoot...to be continued.

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